“Because That’s Who I Am.”

Self-identity can be a tricky thing. Especially when what we think we know is questioned or contradicted by those who know us best. Especially when who we think we are is challenged by difficult circumstances or confusing situations.

And then there’s those moments of clarity when we realize that the identity that we purposefully created for ourselves all those years ago… just. doesn’t. work. All the time and money and energy spent creating the image that once meant so much to us? *Poof!* Gone.

It’s easy to fall into depression and self-doubt when that happens. How could we have been so wrong? What does it mean that we got something so basic about ourselves wrong?

In means, quite simply, that we are growing, developing human beings. And we are not alone. Adaptability is central to our survival in an ever-changing world.

It is also important to remember that even with our ever-changing identity, there is a set of core attributes that do not change over time. Through all of the identities that I have claimed over the years, some of my core traits that have remained constant include:
– strength
– independence/self-reliance
– distrust
– love
The first 2 traits have developed more and more fully with each new transformation. The distrust is a trait I sometimes wish I could let go of, but many times its darker side has served me well and saved me some heartache, even as it prevented potentially good connections with people. And love is the trait which I consciously claim every single day – even on those days when it’s hard work!

So even when the answer to the question, “Who are you?” is uncertain and in flux, one answer always remains: I am a strong, loving woman.

So, who are you?